The Larger Truth
by Can-I-Keep-You80
Summary: An AU in which Laura is a fired reporter who unknowingly meets the senator's daughter Carmilla. Laura begins to realize how narrow her world view really is. Meanwhile Danny is a rival reporter ready to take Laura's place. Lafontaine and Perry find themselves as head assistants to opposing political powerhouses and find themselves accidentally in a modern Romeo and Juliet situation.
1. Chapter 1

Laura's night was going positively amazing. She felt as if she had finally arrived. She dragged herself through college and went through several torturous internships all in hopes of one day being invited to an event just like the one she stood in now. She was in awe of the decadent gowns, perfectly tailored suits and never empty trays of champagne. It would be easy to get lost in the glamour, but she had a job to do.

The fundraiser was in full swing and she wasn't there as a benefactor, but rather the eager reporter out for a headline worthy story. There were plenty of important people there to rub elbows with. Bankers laughed with round jiggling bellies. Politicians raised false smiles and gave numerous empty promises. Celebrities of all varieties remained in a constant state of posing for cameras real and imagined.

Laura was indeed a reporter but not of the celebrity variety. She also didn't carry a camera. All the small woman had was a pen, paper and undeniable pride that seemed to increase her perceived height by a substantial amount.

She walked with heavy but determined steps between potential stories. Laura often forgot to view people as human beings. Instead she saw blocks of text. She passed over text that read as a text book. Telling a truth everyone already knew always struck her as redundant and a waste of time. She could just see the headline already.

(Celebrities, politicians and other benefactors mingle at large fundraiser for the homeless and other needy)

Boring and predictable reporting. She sought something far more eye catching like, (Shocking truths revealed by the tipsiest of the city's most important leaders)

Things were looking up for Laura at the magazine HQ. She moved from fluffy pieces about city superintendant's dusty coin collections to most recently a piece on the rivaling sides in the senate. They were important pieces, especially the latter, but they were merely more detailed accounts of already widely known truths. She aspired to uncover truths rather than explain them.

Her eyes traveled the room while her ears jumped between conversations. With so many people mingling in the same ballroom, there were plenty to choose between. To anyone observing Laura, she looked like an out of place plus one who had probably lost her date. Laura knew that and took full advantage of it, eavesdropping on the intoxicated guests.

After a while of careful searching she found the beginnings of a story. The governor was noticeably missing from the event, but no one seemed to have an answer as to why. That was until a disgruntled waiter spoke on his phone in a quick whisper.

Laura followed him into a service hall where he thought he was alone. He complained about the rich being inherently rude for several minutes until he calmed down enough to say "At least the governor isn't here. He's the worst of them all."

Laura listened intently. If anyone would be privy to secrets and be willing to divulge, it would be the underappreciated wait staff.

The man was quiet while the person on the other end of the phone gave their response to his rant. Finally the man admitted with a huff, "I don't know, the old man is still sick. Worse than ever is what it seems. Good riddance, the man is a pain in the ass to serve."

The momentary silence filled Laura's ears with white noise. Or maybe that was the familiar feeling of adrenalin she got before discovering a story.

"Anyway I should get back. God forbid these people function for five minutes without being waited on hand and foot."

He ended the call with a click and a sigh. The call might have been over, but the story certainly wasn't. Laura could see the headline now in giant red letters. (Governor deathly ill: Misses important event)

She smiled with satisfaction at her work so far and set out to find her boss. She had more digging to do and was ready to get to it. Laura hurried through the jubilant crowd. She no longer listened into people's conversations. She had a story and was going to roll with it full force forward.

With a sigh of relief she found her boss Charlie. Laura found Charlie attractive but didn't focus much on it. Boss was of course off limits. Even if she was a woman with long legs, blond hair and an equality sticker on her car. Those tell tale facts aside, Laura had no trouble keeping work and her personal life separate. Not that she had much of a personal life, but Charlie definitely wouldn't be invited into it.

"Hey Charlie. I've got a huge potential stor-"

"Oh good Laura you're here. I need you to clear something up for me immediately."

Charlie's face had a smile on it, but it looked like it was fastened on with crazy glue. Something wasn't right.

"I assigned you the piece (Friction in the senate) did I not?"

Laura swallowed "Yes you did. I'm not sure I understand what's goin-"

"Tell me Laura, did you graduate from college yesterday? Or perhaps were you simply born yesterday?"

"-No"

"Then explain to me exactly what you were thinking when you left your notes in the bathroom of the capital?"

Carmilla quickly grew bored of the party. She had grown accustomed to gold ceilings, classical music and food on literal silver platters. She didn't want any of it. She longed for her grungy loft with her fold out bed and leaky bathroom sink. (Admittedly her bathroom sink doubled as a kitchen sink) Even the neighbor's muffled arguments were now so commonplace they were just background noise.

At home she could be splayed out eating an entire can of Pringles in her underwear and nobody was there to judge. Here she felt a thousand eyes on her at once. The collar of her shirt seemed to shrink throughout the night and there wasn't enough alcohol in the world to submerge the ever present anxiety pushing her against the earth's surface.

She walked along the walls hoping to spend the night unnoticed by her mother or her minions. Being a senator's daughter had its perks. She could get out of a speeding ticket with ease and most restaurants in the city gave her free food. But mostly she resented her mother's career choice. Her behavior was constantly under the microscope as "Any indiscretion could ruin senator Karnstein's reputation."

She felt more like a loose end than a daughter. Part of her missed the old days when her mother wasn't a politician, merely a lawyer in the Army. The other part of her remembers the constant disorientation she lived in. Always being the new girl that was being raised by something comparable to a dictator. In those days her mother voiced her disapproval personally. Now she just sent her assistant Perry to deliver kind cease and desist orders.

Carmilla had a relative fondness for Perry. At least she didn't shout like a drill sergeant. She did however have a voice that had no limit on how high it could go with aggravation. Carmilla often enjoyed torturing the neighborhood cats by aggravating the persistent assistant.

Perry wasn't here for entertainment now so she hugged walls and chugged champagne willing time to fly by so she could leave. She walked in deliberate circles avoiding eye contact and drunken invitations for conversation. She must have racked up a couple miles before she was stopped in her tracks. For one, her path was blocked; secondly the woman blocking her path was breathtakingly beautiful. The woman was maybe an inch shorter than herself but she stood as if she was ten feet tall.

She wore golden heals that matched her sparkling gold dress. The dress looking painted on in all the right (or maybe wrong) places. The dress cupped her hips, held her torso tightly and pushed her breasts up. It wasn't trashy as there was only enough cleavage to accentuate her look without reducing her to simple eye candy. Her light brown hair was pulled up into a tightly sealed bun and around her neck was a tiny locket necklace. It didn't exactly match the intense level of the rest of the outfit so she assumed it was a sentimental choice. (A gift from a doting boyfriend perhaps.) The thought drained the blood from Carmilla's face.

Of course the woman had to be taken. You'd have to be blind not to notice her. So why was she still looking, she obviously had no chance in hell? This was especially true since she was currently attending an event where her mother was an important honorary guest. Yet she still stood there, rooted to the spot and transfixed by the beauty that stood before her. It took another woman (tall and blond) to start shouting at the shorter woman for Carmilla to focus in on what was actually happening.

"Yes Laura your notes. You left them for the world and the entire senate to see."

So her name was Laura. Beautiful, petite Laura.

"I know for a fact I didn't leave my notes. I used them that night to write the piece."

"Oh, so conveniently someone else was working on a piece called friction in the senate? They also happened to be there the same day as you and left notes in the bathroom of the same wing you did your interviews in?"

Laura scoffed but didn't manage to hide the panic in her eyes. The more the women argued, the harder the realization hit that the beautiful woman was a reporter of some sort making her even more untouchable. Her mother had warned her once, it wouldn't happen again.

"Look Laura, I ignored the incident last month. I looked the other way and gave you the benefit of the doubt. This time I'm not so sure I can."

Carmilla finally managed to tear herself away from the women and their conversation. It wasn't her business and Laura was off limits anyhow. She continued on an alternate path cursing both her sexuality and eyeballs for noticing Laura to begin with. She saw beautiful women all the time but none of them stuck in her mind beyond a few seconds. She was having a hard time understanding why Laura, who had not even looked at Carmilla was so ingrained on her brain. Her stomach flipped at the thought of her name and a dark whispering voice echoed from the depths of her mind "She's different." Whatever the reason, it didn't matter. She had to forget her.

While lost in thought she neglected the effort required to be stealthy and go unnoticed. A cracked voice, low and intrusive called out "Carmilla!" She was met with the greasy face of a young man she had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting on several occasions. He was the assistant chairman of something or other involving traffic. Or maybe it was roads. She didn't pay much attention to him and spent her time trying to avoid the man her mother once tried to set her up with. The date had gone the only possibly way it could have, horribly. She vividly remembered the end of the night where a horrified cab driver watched in his rear view mirror as she puked her stomach full of alcohol all over his back seat. You would think her date would be sufficiently turned off and would avoid her in the future. He must not have many options as he still tried to get into her pants at every party and event.

"Hey Carmilla. Still hanging gay?" Your mom assured me you weren't."

"Tommy, gay or not you have got no chance in hell." She kept the venom in her voice to a minimum but didn't refrain from mentally pummeling him in every possibly sensitive area of his body.

He dropped his voice to a whisper. "Its Tom not Tommy. Come on I've got a career. I'm important." He pleaded eyes wide and forehead wrinkled.

"To your mom maybe. Mostly you are just in my way. Have a goodnight Tommy."

He gawked at her as she left, too shocked at her unmasked distaste to eye her back end as he usually did. She felt giddy for the moment but knew she'd hear from Perry tonight about how a lady should act in a social engagement. That was a worry for later. Now it was time to exit the building without anyone noticing.

She took to hugging the walls once again and practically ran towards the staircase. Running faster than Cinderella at midnight she made her way to the coat check. After struggling to find her ticket, the balding man with a drooping face and crossed eyes handed her a leather coat and a backpack with only one strap remaining. It wasn't much but she didn't need a lot from the world.

Chilly air filled her nostrils and froze her brain. It did wonders to push away the remaining anxiety from the party. She hadn't been there long but it still took a lot out of her. Her loft was a long way away from the party but walking away from her mother felt more productive than catching a cab. She wanted to use her own legs.

Her entire night had once again been consumed by her mother's event. She had no business being there but as the senator's daughter she was expected to be there regardless of her lack of use there. She lived a life of expectation, and was determined to pull against it however possible. So she walked across the literal train tracks to the side of town she chose to live in. Far from her mother's immediate reach.

The walk was inspiring as it always was. Empty brick building between claimed buildings used for apartments far tinier than should be legal. Women darting behind building to go to work and jumpy hands exchange packaged prison sentences.

This was the culture she chose to sink into. To an outsider this place probably seemed messy and absolutely outside the law. But to Carmilla it was raw and unflinching. These people were the castaways of society. And she being she gay poet and reluctant senator's daughter, fit in surprisingly well.

She was still several blocks from home when she noticed a building she passed by on many occasions with new windows and lights on. Another building claimed for tiny apartments. The building presented itself for tonight's project. She had used dozens of building in projects before, but none had called out to her quite like this one. She thought of what her mother would think of her side project and felt more motivation than ever. Snapping on her mask she went to work.

Nearly twenty minutes passed and she was putting the finishing touches on her work when an exasperated "Really?" touched her ears. Well it wasn't Perry or her mother so she hoped to be able to talk her way out of trouble.

Carmilla pulled her mask down and turned around. In that exact moment she realized the universe hated her. Standing before her was Laura. Beautiful Laura. Laura the reporter that with a click to her keyboard could get her mother and the law involved. She stood dumbfounded not sure how to get out of this one.

"I just moved in and already I have hoodlums painting graffiti on the building. What in the hell does that even mean?" She asked pointing to the drying paint behind Carmilla.

"I….it…Did you just call me a hoodlum?"

"Yes."

"How old are you? A hundred?

She was not a women to be swayed or distracted.

"You don't get to ask questions before you've answered mine."

"Aren't you pushy."

"Tell me or I call the cops."

Carmilla looked at her handy work. In simple white paint it said "To whom it may concern…"with opening and closing quotation marks on either end of the phrase.

"Well cutie, its half a poem."

"If it's only half then why are the quotation marks closed? Additionally my name is Laura, not cutie. Remember that."

"Remember that for next time you catch me putting up half a quote on a wall?"

Laura frowned and pinched her eyebrows together. Clearly she wasn't in the mood, but the look made Carmilla's stomach start to flip once again. As a peace offering and gesture of good will she decided to explain.

"Look its half art piece half work of literature. I put up half a poem and at first it annoys people that it's there. Then it annoys them that there isn't an ending. I let it sit there for a while until the city paints over it. That's when I put up the other half."

Laura nodded, drinking in the explanation and giving Carmilla time to drink her in. Laura's coat was over her shoulders but arms weren't in it. Her hair was now disheveled, falling into a messy bun at the base of her neck. Her shoes were in hand and eyes were blood shot and swollen. It looked like someone had actually managed to have a worse night than her.

"You look like you've had a rough night. I'm sorry if I've made it worse."

Finally Laura's shoulders drooped and Carmilla realized she probably wasn't getting in trouble. Yet her heart was still at top speed and stomach still in knots.

"You didn't. Make it worse I mean. You just scared me is all. Didn't expect anyone to be out this late."

"Well why are you out so late?"

"I went to an event type thing. Got fired. Decided to walk home and got lost. I haven't lived here that long. Then I run into a girl having an existential crisis and taking it out on the side of my building. Now I'm babbling to her when she couldn't care less."

Carmilla wasn't sure what to say to any of that but she knew she wanted to comfort Laura who looked like she was about to cry again. She knew she shouldn't. But-didn't she just say she had been fired. Unemployed people weren't specifically banned right?"

"Well here-" Carmilla took off her gloves and mask, each with a snap and held out a hand. "I'm Carmilla. It's nice to meet you."

Laura shook her hand in silence.

"Now you know me. So you aren't babbling to a stranger, just your friendly neighborhood hoodlum."

Laura let out a noise somewhere between a laugh and a sob. "I can't believe I just befriended the local graffiti girl."

"I prefer the term poem painter, but tomato tom-a-to."

Laura smiled and looked down at their hands that were still joined for some reason.

"Well…goodnight." She took her hand back with an almost undetectable wince. "And I will uh- look out for the other half of this thing. Of this poem I mean."

She shook her head and ran into the building without another word.

Carmilla still transfixed muttered under her breath, "Smooth Sundance, smooth" while she gathered her supplies to leave.

What in the hell has she gotten herself into?


	2. Chapter 2

Today was not Laura's day. In fact, this entire week was not turning out to be a good one. She had sent out thousands of applications to reputable magazines and papers. But as it would seem, she had been blacklisted. After all her efforts the only response she had gotten was from an online magazine similar to the onion.

Apparently they thought it was funny that she had been fired. Despite her apprehension, she had bills to pay so the position would have to do. Besides, the position paid per article or piece. Theoretically she could earn a lot of money.

The transition however, from ground breaking journalism to satire that bordered on patronizing rambling was not an easy adjustment for Laura to make. It didn't help that her concentration levels were sporadic at best. The dark haired beauty she caught defiling her apartment building was never far from her mind.

At first she found herself filled with embarrassment. She rambled to the woman and admitted that instead of conquering her career, it conquered her. She was angry at the time and probably gave the woman an bad impression.

Laura was never very good with women. She was tactless and often times far too literal. It didn't matter anyway. She would probably never see Carmilla gain anyhow, or so she thought.

Upon the third night she couldn't sleep, she took to pacing her living room and plotting her return. On a whim she stopped, turned and looked out of the window to find-Carmilla. She stood and stared at her handy work, her head shaking slightly with disapproval. The city still hadn't painted over her work which meant she couldn't finish it yet. Work left unfinished had a way of making a person uneasy. They themselves feel unfinished.

Laura looked away before Carmilla could catch her ogling. Really she had no excuse for staring at her, and she didn't relish the idea of having to explain herself. She went to bed and tried to push the woman out of her mind.

Unfortunately life wasn't that easy. Each night she paced her living room and each night Carmilla stopped by to look at her work. After several nights it dawned on Laura that the reason she actually couldn't sleep was because subconsciously, she was waiting to see Carmilla. Now that she was made aware of her habit, it was no longer a subconscious thought. It was now a full blown realization. What it was she was going to do she didn't know, but she has to do something before she went insane.

Her night felt long and empty. Since attending her mother's fundraiser something just didn't sit right with her. She looked for any solution within reach. She cleaned her loft until it sparkled in every corner. She paid all her past due bills and even managed to send in some poems for a new joint project.

After trying her best, Carmilla was still unable to figure out what was gnawing at her. It was like going to the store and knowing you are forgetting something, but not being able to figure out what it was.

She thought briefly about the project she started recently on the new apartment building. She couldn't think about the project without thinking about Laura. She figured one of the two were probably the source of her discomfort. Figuring out which was which would likely prove to be impossible. Thankfully both options were located in the same place. Knowing that, Carmilla pulled on her coat and made the late night walk to Laura's.

Once there, Carmilla did her best not to search the upstairs windows to find which one was Laura's. Unless the woman was dangling out of the window she really wouldn't have a clue anyway. Instead she focused on her work

There it was, just as she had left it. It was unaltered which was nice, but it also hadn't been covered up yet either. Covering it herself wouldn't be an option as that would both ruin her process and the authenticity of her work. So with a small scoff she turned to leave. Bound to return another day.

She couldn't however, bring herself to actually leave. There was a strange feeling settling on her shoulders. What was that feeling? Eyes, she determined. Someone was watching her. Slowly and carefully she raised her eyes, keeping her head facing to the wall. It only took a second to find who was staring at her, and it was of course, Laura. The babbling woman with light brown hair and a smile that had the power to melt solid stone. It occurred to Carmilla that Laura could be trying to figure out who the stranger standing outside her building was. Another part of her (the larger part) was hoping Laura remembered her and was looking just to look.

Either way, Carmilla had no reasonable excuse to stand there any longer. She shook her head a the unfinished work one last time and returned home, admittedly with a spring in her step.

The next night Carmilla laid in bed tossing and turning until she somehow turned into a multi layer burrito with her blankets and sheets. She couldn't sleep, which was unusual for her. Typically she could fall asleep smack in the middle of a tornado if she wanted to. The ceiling which was typically never seen by Carmilla (for many reasons) was now all she could see.

She looked at the spots on the ceiling trying desperately to form pictures and stories out of them. She knew all to well her efforts would be futile. She knew what she wanted to see and it wasn't her ceiling.

Eventually Carmilla gave up, throwing on the nearest hoodie and pair of pants she could find. She found her converses under her bed and cursed whoever decided it was a social requirement to wear shoes nearly at all times. Shoes felt confining and unnatural in all the worst ways. Perhaps it was dangerous to walk around barefoot in the city but she wasn't stupid. Carmilla was perfectly able of looking out for sharp objects.

She thought of the press coverage she would get if she was caught walking around without shoes. (Senator's daughter: Dangerous hippie or feet activist?) She laughed at herself but knew full well some magazine somewhere would post something that ridiculous. Nothing Laura would work at though. Carmilla brought herself back to why she was putting on shoes to begin with and began to lace them with urgency.

That's how it went. Night after night Carmilla gave a pitiful effort to sleep and ended up at Laura's pretending to look at her work while also pretending not to notice Laura. She wondered if Laura knew she was getting up in the early hours of the morning just to see her blurry silhouette from the corner of her eyes. The nightly visits began to last longer each time. If Laura didn't know already, she would have to catch on soon.

On the fifth night Carmilla turned to leave as usual when a voice akin to a cartoon whispered (loudly somehow) "Carmilla Karnstein, what exactly are you doing?"

"Perry, its like three in the morning. Why are you following me?"

She pulled her blouse on her arms and secured each button with care. Glancing to the bed, Perry saw Lafontaine still naked and sleeping under the blankets. She hated to leave them while they slept, but secrecy came above sentimental pleasantries. She zipped her boots slowly, trying with all her might not to wake her partner.

Was that the right word? Playmate? Secret lover? Perry shook her head. She knew going into that would take all of her brain function and she really needed to get home unnoticed. The task was daunting to say the least.

Perry pulled open the bedroom door with a creek and a wince. Lafontaine rolled over but didn't seem to wake so Perry took the opportunity to bolt. Practically running, she made her way through the kitchen and then the back door.

The surrounding neighborhood was quiet, too quiet. Checking her phone, she saw first three texts from her boss senator Karnstien and then the time. Two AM. No wonder it was so quiet, the whole city was asleep.

She wondered if Carmilla was awake as she neared the neighborhood of her boss' daughter. There wasn't much of an age difference between Carmilla and herself, but Perry took a direct approach to life. Nothing but absolute domination would do. So fittingly she found herself in politics after college. She started out making signs and canvassing neighborhoods. Now she was the senator's right hand for all intents and purposes. Perry tried to pay little attention that her success was found within the conservative party.

Success was success and a pay check was a pay check. We all did things we didn't necessarily like in order to pay the bills.

Although as she made her walk of shame back home, dancing between shadows, a bit of doubt crept in. Her life would never be her own. She was part of a political machine first, a lover of women second. It was lonely sometimes. After leaving the office she was just Perry, she wasn't head assistant anymore. She turned to Lafontaine for company and comfort but was never able to settle in.

Lafontaine was the very embodiment of what the conservative party was against. Laf was a person that identified as no gender. Their pronouns were they/them/their and they absolutely loved women. They lived their life loud and proud. Honestly its one of the things Perry liked most about them. They fought for their own rights as well as everyone else's on a daily basis right on the front lines. No amount of respect would be enough for them and their efforts.

Lafontaine was everything to Perry, everything including her most guarded secret. Her career would be demolished if anyone were to ever find out about them. Thinking of that alone, Perry quickened her speed to get home.

She was passing yet another dark alley in a blur when a flash of curly brown hair and a bright white hoodie caught her attention. This was the first person she had seen tonight and it surprised her that anyone would be out so late.

Although, as she got a closer look and stopped in her tracks, she realized she shouldn't have been surprised.

"Carmilla Karnstein, what exactly are you doing?"

Carmilla whipped around to face her with guilt and shock written all over her face and body posture.

"Perry, its like three AM. Why are you following me?"

Perry scoffed at her accusation. "I am not following you, I just happen to be passing by you. I am allowed to have a life you know."

Carmilla lifted the corner of her mouth ever so slightly. Perry knew she had always suspected her orientation but they had a mutual understanding that some things were meant to stay a secret. Nevertheless Carmilla still enjoyed pushing her boundaries.

"Not according to mother. We aren't supposed to have lives. Didn't you know?"

"Ok fine" Perry corrected "I'm allowed to have a quiet life."

"Quiet life with a couple cats and a roommate huh?" Carmilla raised her fingers to form air quotes at the word roommate.

"Go home Carmilla, or I will tell your mother you are up to something. This isn't even your building. What are you doing here?"

Perry noticed paint on the wall but no cans or paint on Carmilla so there was no way of pinning that on her, not that she wanted Carmilla to know that.

"I'm taking in the scenery."

"The scenery of a brick wall?"

Carmilla clenched her teeth together and spoke though them "Goodnight Perry. You have work in the morning. You should get some sleep."

Perry wanted to stay and return the unwelcome venom, but she was unfortunately right. She had to be up in a mere two hours for work. So with a lot of effort, she let it go.

Laura waited for Carmilla just as she had every other night. She watched without shame and knew to take a seat as the woman had been staying longer and longer each night. Laura didn't mind, it was just like taking a bigger hit of the drug she so craved. Though she did wonder why Carmilla stayed so long each night.

She never did anything but stare at the wall. Or so it seemed. It was after all impossible to tell where the woman's eyes were through her bangs. Maybe she knew Laura was looking and she was allowing herself to be looked at. The possibility sent a shiver down her spine and added to the coil in her lower stomach.

Carmilla turned to leave for the night but was stopped by a woman with bright red curly hair and crossed arms. They exchanged words too quiet for Laura to hear, but it peaked her interest. It was exceptionally late to be running into friends or acquaintances. Was this perhaps her girlfriend coming to figure out where Carmilla goes each night? As the woman with curly hair shook her head, Laura realized it was a definite and depressing possibility.

Depressing? Why depressing Laura thought? It wasn't like Laura had any chance or better yet any explanation whatsoever for her behavior. Why should it matter to her who Carmilla was with?

Laura studied Carmilla and realized she was looking increasingly agitated by the second. Maybe this was her in. She pulled on a pair of shoes and bounded out of the apartment and down the stairs wearing sweatpants and a tee-shirt. She would have to regret that later she thought as she reached the lobby. Right now she needed to go for it before she lost her nerve.

Laura threw open the door and realized first the redhead was gone and second that Carmilla was walking away.

"Carmilla wait."

Carmilla stopped and turned but remained silent.

"I have a question" Laura continued before her nerves had the chance to boil over.

"What's your question cutie?"

"It's Laura."

"Your question is Laura?"

"Wha- No, my name is Laura."

Carmilla smirked. "Ok Laura, what is your question?"

She actually hadn't thought that far ahead and asking how do you get your face to be so god damn gorgeous probably wasn't an option.

"I just heard you and that woman arguing." (That was a lie) "And wondered if everything was ok?"

Really Hollis? That was the best you could come up with? Laura was mentally pummeling herself when Carmilla answered with a breezy voice that danced through Laura's ear canals.

"Everything is fine. She works with my mother and essentially we were both trying to figure out what the other was doing out so late."

"What are you doing out so late?"

Carmilla stilled. "I was just checking to see if my work needed to be finished."

"But you just checked last night."

Obviously she was the worst investigative journalist to ever exist. You don't give what you know out so freely.

"And how would you know that?"

Laura did go running to Carmilla so she could go for it right? Now was her chance. Carmilla clearly knew why Laura was aware of her previous visits. She had to know with her immaculate raised eyebrow and devilish grin. And really, what did she have to lose?


	3. Chapter 3

Carmilla couldn't believe how her night was turning out. First she ran into Perry who was clearly making her walk of shame, then Laura came bounding outside babbling once again. In another twist of events, it seemed that through all her rambling, Laura was actually trying to ask her out. In her haste to get Carmilla's attention, Laura accidentally revealed she knew Carmilla had been frequenting the apartment building. Carmilla of course was already aware that Laura knew about the visits, but she was determined to keep at least some of her mysterious reputation.

Most important thing in that moment though was keeping control of her eyeballs which were trying to linger on Laura's tight, white tee shirt that clung to her torso in the chilly evening air. Focus was a hard thing to maintain around Laura which was becoming far more obvious with each of their encounters. Thankfully that seemed to be a mutual problem.

After letting Laura ramble for a while, Carmilla decided to help the adorable woman.

"And how would you know that?"

Laura stared,unable to respond just yet.

"That's ok. No need to explain. But in all fairness you got to ask me about my mother's minion so I think I get to ask you a question as well."

Even through the dark Carmilla could see Laura blushing and nodding slightly.

"I am performing tomorrow night. I think it will help my nerves if I have someone with me…I know it is short notice, but I was hoping you would join me."

Laura ran her fingers through her hair nearly giving Carmilla a heart attack.

"A performance? What kind of performance?"

"Oh its poetry night at this theater downtown. Its a little dingy but its a legendary venue. It really is an honor to be invited to perform."

"Then shouldn't you be bringing some bombshell to dangle on your arm?"

The corners of Carmilla's mouth pulled up and her eyes glittered under the street light for the briefest of moments.

"Yes, that's why I'm asking you."

Laura stumbled backwards, grinning and no doubt preparing for some more rambling.

"Really? Me? I mean that's nice of you I just…"

"It's ok to say no. It wont hurt my feelings." It would, of course it would.

Laura stood frozen. Maybe that was the wrong thing to say.

"I'm not saying no. I'm saying yes. I'm just surprised."

Carmilla stared at Laura with a purposely blank expression. It was as if she was hiding something, or hiding some feeling she didn't want to show.

"I'll see you tomorrow night then. At eight. Dress is semi casual."

Laura receded back into the building, grin plastered wide and hands shaking. She had grown accustomed to reading people carefully and quickly. It never took her long to figure people out. The one exception seemed to be Carmilla. She read less like a book and more like an ancient cypher, the key to it lost long ago.

After several nights of pretending not to stare at each other, they both decided to act in the same night. It felt like a dream, or maybe a nightmare. Either way Laura felt she needed to pinch herself.

For once Laura seemed lost for words. It was certainly an alien feeling to her. It was her job to have a multitude of words for every occasion or moment. Yet here she stood in a moment she coveted, and she had nothing to say. She only nodded and retreated back into the lobby leaving Carmilla with a slack jaw and squinted eyes.

Laura couldn't really blame her for being a tad dumbfounded. After all who could have predicted tonight's events? She mulled it over with a mixture of excitement and anxiety as she made her way back upstairs. Only when she reached her landing did she realize she forgot to ask Carmilla something. It was probably her original question but Carmilla was distracting.

She took the stairs two, sometimes three at a time hoping to catch Carmilla before she was out of listening range.

She reached the lobby door once again. This time with a pinch between her ribs and far more solid determination. With the last of her breath she shouted "Carmilla" into the night. Thankfully Carmilla hadn't gotten far and Laura's voice could still reach her. It unfortunately also seemed to reach the neighbors, several of which turned on their lights simultaneously. Laura scolded herself internally at the amount of potential embarrassment she was causing herself. Shaking it off, she forced herself to address Carmilla before she took off.

"I forgot to ask earlier-"

"Yes I'm hella gay."

"What?"

"Oh, that wasn't your question?"

It wasn't but it was still good information to have, and it made Laura smile which is nice.

"No, I was wondering if I could get your number? You know-just in case I get sick and can't make it or something."

"Are you planning on blowing me off cutie?"

Laura shook her head not bothering to correct her. Carmilla chuckled and rattled off her number quickly before giving a brief wave and ducking between buildings.

Laura was good with words not numbers. She swore quietly and took off hoping to get to a pen and pad of paper before the numbers blurred and were lost all together. She knew Carmilla was just ensuring Laura couldn't blow her off easily so she couldn't be too frustrated. It was sort of endearing actually that Carmilla could possibly think Laura would blow her off. Who on earth would be blind or dumb enough to blow off Carmilla anyway? She couldn't help smile, that of all people Carmilla chose Laura to be her date.

Flinging her apartment door open she found pen and paper. Her brain, as it seemed, wanted to see Carmilla just as much as her eyes do. She remembered the number, jotting it down on a scrap of paper.

It took a moment to realize that the scrap paper Laura found was actually notes for the first piece at her new job. Apparently in the moment, her priorities did a flip flop. It was a sign of things to come. Even if Laura couldn't see it yet.

Carmilla woke the next morning with butterflies predominantly occupying her stomach. Even before her morning coffee, her heart fluttered uncontrollably. It made it hard to breath, but Carmilla knew she wasn't dying. She was just excited. Interesting that the feeling of death and the feeling of absolute ecstasy should be so similar.

Now in the bathroom, Carmilla looked past her reflection that showed tangled hair, smudged eyeliner and glossy eyes. Today was Laura day she thought. Or rather it would be Laura night tonight. But who needed semantics when tonight was Laura night?

What she did need was a time machine to close the eight hour gap between now and her date. Was it a date? She thought she had been clear and Laura seemed intelligent. Unfortunately obliviousness wasn't limited to the unintelligent. She shook it off trying to maintain this feeling as long as possible. Previously she felt empty, forgetful and buzzing with anxiety. Now she felt more full than from any Christmas feast. It was a remarkable feeling, but even so, she was still restless. She had no choice but to fill her day and distract her one track mind.

Six hours later Carmilla had gotten a hair trim, bought new paints, completed three projects around the city, sent her mother the usual weekly text stating she was both alive and not in jail, and picked at a club sandwich for lunch. Now two hours remained which Carmilla instantly knew was too long.

Her outfit, she decided, needed to be as stereotypically lesbian as possible in order to help the meaning of tonight to be as clear as possible. Two hours later she paced in said outfit until the clock ticked it's way to 7:30PM. Smiling to herself as she locked the door, Carmilla thought with a swelling heart, it's Laura night.

Carmilla would be here at any moment, and as usual Laura was running behind. She was neither dressed nor mentally prepared to see Carmilla again. Her inability to get ready in a timely manner and nerves aside, she was thrilled to see Carmilla again. It would be up close and hopefully in a better light than their previous encounters.

She tried on approximately a thousand outfits before settling on a simple burgundy dress with lace that went from her neck to her upper torso. It was revealing without risking anything actually falling out. She chose flats for the night as she usually did on dates. Her dates typically preferred to be taller than her, which wasn't hard to do generally, but Carmilla was just barely taller than her so heals might push her over the tall threshold.

That was one of a thousand things that passed through her mind as something that could go wrong. That's what happened in every situation, date or not. She thought of everything that could go wrong and the possible solution for each of them. They were mini mental research papers she had assigned herself, and for this particular date, the word count was already endless.

She was still silently panicking when a clicking sound echoed through her still empty apartment. Several clicks later and Laura went to the window without thinking. Opening it she saw Carmilla grinning slightly and clutching small rocks in her hand. Although after a moment the smile fell and so did her jaw after she shouted "Hey, if that's what you're wearing cupcake, I might have to change our plans for the night."

It only took a split second for Laura to realize she had picked out a dress but never actually put it on. She was hanging out of the window to look at Carmilla in nothing but a bra and underwear. So much for a better light.

Laura back up slightly, hoping to at least conceal her lower half. "I'll be down in just a sec." she shouted back before running to get dressed. She slid into her dress and flats simultaneously, trying to save time. Bouncing down the stairs she thanked the weather for not making her sweaty from her efforts to rush.

However, as she left the building and her eyes found Carmilla, Laura wished she wold have just walked down the stairs. She needed all her breath to take in the sight, and she knew she was nowhere near ready to have what little breath that remained be stolen from her. She was lost for words once again. Laura reporter Hollis had no words.

Carmilla was in a see-through white button up with long, wide sleeves and a black tie that matched her black bra and skin tight leather pants. Laura could see every curve of the woman's body and her eyes took far too long to travel up and down Carmilla's frame. Laura would be perfectly satisfied to stand there and stare at her throughout the night. Carmilla of course, had other plans. At least she could stare at her on stage Laura thought before Carmilla broke the spell.

"I thought I would be disappointed when you actually put on clothes, but you look amazing."

Laura felt the blood rush to her face and knew it was likely the same shade as her dress.

"Thanks, you look great too." That was the understatement of the year and Laura struggled to keep her voice steady. She was also pretty sure Carmilla noticed the effort, but she kept all possible comments to herself.

Head tilted, Carmilla suggested they get going and hailed a cab.

The cab ride was silent and a little awkward but not necessarily unpleasant. Carmilla tapped her foot throughout the entire ride to a beat that was foreign to Laura, but it was nice to see she wasn't the only nervous one. Granted her nerves might be more related to her performance rather than their date.

Once there, Carmilla shook visibly. She was still hot (obviously) but the nerves added a whole new element to the mystery that was Carmilla. Laura realized in that thought, she had no idea what her last name was. That would be a question for later when Carmilla would think properly.

Carmilla led Laura to her seat in the crowd but was reluctant to leave her there. A balding man in the seat next to Laura's was clearly and unabashedly eye fucking Laura.

With some convincing, Carmilla went backstage to wait her turn. Several people went before Carmilla. Some of them were talented, telling tales of triumph and tales of defeat. Maybe Laura could have enjoyed them more if she wasn't so impatient to hear and see Carmilla's reading. She honestly had no idea what to expect.

It wasn't until Carmilla strode on stage looking far more cool and collected than before, that Laura felt at ease. She was ready to hear what piece of herself Carmilla was willing to share. Honestly, it may be the best way to get to know someone.


	4. Chapter 4

The stage lights were blinding. The announcer called her name, first only by request. Her feet felt heavy as cement blocks. The feeling was instantly recognizable. It was dread. The feeling was far from foreign. Every stuffy party and handsy politician had prepared her for this moment. She just had to go for it.

And so she did.

Putting one foot in front of the other, Carmilla reached the microphone. Standing dead center of the stage, she looked to make sure Laura was okay, but didn't allow herself to linger any longer. Her nerves were already wreaking havoc on her ability to focus. That fire didn't need anymore fuel.

Clearing her throat. she knew it was time and there was no looking back.

"Hello, I'm Carmilla. This piece is called I didn't." Carmilla cleared her throat once again, still not allowing herself to look at Laura.

"I didn't ask

because I didn't want to know

I didn't see

because my eyes clenched shut

I didn't run

because I didn't have the strength

I didn't live

because I was too busy pretending not to

One day

I will ask

and then know

I will see

with open eyes

I will run

with the strength of a thousand armys

I will live

and know life to be swell"

/

Carmilla could see most of the audience clapping, but couldn't hear a thing. Her ears rung incessantly until her eyes drifted to meet Laura's, then nothing. Laura sat guarded, with arms crossed and a layer of carefully placed gloss over her eyes. The corner of her mouth pulled up as Carmilla locked onto her gaze.

Maybe she hated it. Or maybe, just maybe she loved it and was simply unable to show it. That didn't seem to be a problem for the rest of the audience who continued to clap until she walked off stage. She may have been too flustered to follow directions and walked to the wrong side of the stage, but no one needed to know that.

All that needed to be known was if Laura enjoyed it or was freaked out and ready to flee. It was never more obvious than at a live reading that Carmilla wasn't exactly the picture of mental stability. But really, who wanted to write or hear of poems about rainbows and unicorns? Laura probably. With a sigh, Carmilla stomped off to find Laura, now fully regretting inviting her in the first place.

Carmilla appeared to be made of stone as she stood planted in front of the microphone. The bright house lights dimmed and a spot light engulfed her body in a glow Laura saw around Carmilla even without the spotlight.

Laura watched as Carmilla's stony facade crumbled and out came someone far different than the woman she thought she knew. This woman fidgeted and looked around with restless eyes. That was until she began to recite her piece, then she just looked broken instead of nervous.

It was short, with a lot of doubt and a dash of hope. It felt more like Carmilla than even the best description. She spoke it carefully, each syllable laced with meaning the woman had assigned to them. She was visible, open and vulnerable.

Maybe it was Carmilla's vulnerability, or perhaps it was the creepy man next to her that looked like he would at any moment pounce on Laura. Whatever the reason, Laura felt herself close off to Carmilla. It was like flowers being bombarded by rain. They needed the water, but it was too much at once. She couldn't help it. She was bombarded by everything Carmilla. Her voice, her body that hunched as if in need of comfort. It was too much for Laura to handle.

Carmilla looked to Laura after her piece. She was searching for something within her, but in that moment, there was nothing to be found. Laura couldn't see what Carmilla was seeing, but if it matched what she was feeling on the inside, she probably looked impenetrable. Using all the effort she had remaining, Laura attempted to give the woman a smile. She didn't manage to pull up much of one before Carmilla left the stage.

Once Carmilla was out of sight, Laura all but ran outside. Seeking fresh air and relief from the tightness in her chest. Laura breathed in the crisp evening air like she was drowning. No amount of oxygen was enough. Her vision started to go black around the edges when a strong set of hands gripped her arms.

"Hey there. Are you okay?"

Carmilla picked her way through the crowd, trying to get to Laura's seat. Several people gave her a thumbs up or a clap on the shoulder as they passed. The approval was nice, their method for showing it was bothersome.

She was already feeling crowded and frustrated when she reached Laura's seat and found it empty. She added slightly panicked to her list of current emotions. Now she pushed her away through the crowd making her way outside with far less care.

When she finally found Laura outside her slight panic turned into full blown panic. Laura looked out of breath and was being held by the odd guy she left her next to before the show. She struggled slightly, but mostly just looked out of it. Carmilla didn't hesitate before running up to them and demanding he let Laura go, to which he gave a throaty laugh.

"I'm just trying to help the little lady. Seems a bit off doesn't she?"

At this Laura tried once again to pull herself free, but it was a feeble attempt at best. Carmilla felt she had no choice but to flip her switch to instincts only and did what came natural to her.

Laura continued to struggle once Carmilla found her. She wanted the man to let her go and leave, but she felt drained and couldn't bring herself to put up a proper fight. As it turns out, she didn't need to. One minute she was standing, trapped in the man's hands, the next Carmilla's fist was colliding with his jaw. The sudden movement sent them both tumbling down and the back of Laura's head hit the man got up with a groan and ran. Laura however, found herself stuck with blood running down her scalp and dripping down her neck.

"Oh fuck. Laura, are you okay?"

Carmilla leaned down with outstretched arms that couldn't find a surface to rest on.

"I didn't think you would go down with him. I just wanted him off you. I'm so sorry."

"You said my name."

Carmilla let her hands drop to the ground and cocked her head to the side.

"What?"

Despite her current state, Laura laughed and sat up.

"You said Laura, not cutie."

"Oh" Carmilla chuckled, "Don't get used to it cutie."

Carmilla stared into Laura's softening eyes before remembering the situation.

"Can you stand? Do you need a doctor?"

Laura shook her head and stood on unsteady feet. "No, but I could probably use help getting home."

Carmilla nodded before telling Laura to stay put for just a second. She returned with a small tee shirt and receipt. It took a moment to realize Carmilla bought an event tee shirt just to stop the bleeding on the back of her head.

"Here, hold this on your head. I'm gonna find us a cab."

"Carm, I can walk you know."

Her words were rendered useless by the swaying of her body that she couldn't control. Carmilla didn't bother to respond beyond an eye roll as she flagged down a cab, nearly getting into a fist fight when someone stole the third cab she tried flagging down.

"Carm…"

"Hang on cutie."

Two more cabs later and Laura had to step in even if it meant stepping on Carmilla's pride. Waddling her way to the curb, Laura kept one hand clutching the shirt to the back of her head and raised the other to place two fingers into her mouth. One ear splitting whistle later, two cabs slammed on breaks in front of her and a stunned Carmilla.

"I didn't know you had a super power cutie."

"The more you know." Laura said with a wink sliding into the back seat of the cab.

Carmilla clamored in next to her, reaching immediately to hold the shirt on Laura's head before she was even fully seated.

"I'm really okay. I just need rest and food. Something sweet I think."

"You have an egregious head wound and all that's effected is your sweet tooth?"

"It's not egregious" Laura scoffed "Head wounds bleed a lot. That doesn't mean its serious. The bleeding has probably already stopped."

Laura tried moving the shirt just to prove a point, but Carmilla wouldn't budge.

"This shirt isn't moving until we are safely in your apartment and I can see it properly."

Laura didn't miss the we or Carmilla inviting herself to her place, but she assumed Carmilla was just trying to make sure she was okay.

It wasn't long before they came to a stop in front of Laura's building. Although, to Carmilla's credit, a short ride equaled a medium to long walk. So the cab was probably a good idea. In fact, the entire walk up to the lobby door, Laura strongly resembled a baby deer. Her legs shook and flailed, but Carmilla held her tight and never let her fall. It took nearly twenty minutes for the pair to get up the stairs and into the apartment.

Carmilla stumbled in, Laura in tow and paused just in the doorway.

"You okay Carm? I thought I was the one with brain damage."

Carmilla pulled her eyebrows together and looked around the apartment quickly. "Yea, I'm okay. I just don't know where anything is."

"Oh yeah, straight back and to the left is the bathroom."

Only when they were in the brightly lit bathroom was it noticeable that blood stained all down Carmilla's right shoulder and sleeve.

"Oh Carm. I'm sorry I bled all over you."

Carmilla shook her head. "No sorry is needed. I'm the one that got you injured to begin with. I owe you the sorry."

"You already said sorry."

"Well then I owe you another sorry. Oh, and whats with the cutting off of half my name?"

"Oh, I know you of all people are not complaining about changing of names are you?"

Carmilla gave a weak smile and replaced the shirt with a wet towel. She paused their dialogue to inspect Laura's wound.

"Well it looks like a small cut here cutie, and its not bleeding anymore. Do you want to try to clean the blood out of your hair or leave it be for now."

Laura felt the back of her head which was sticky and hard, but also a little tender. "I guess I can try to clean it now so I can lay down without worrying about making a mess."

"Okay" Carmilla mumbled while unbuttoning her shirt.

"Woah, what are you doing?" Laura tried her best not to ogle the newly visible skin around her chest and stomach.

"My shirt is already bloody, why get it soaking wet too?"

"Huh? Maybe I'm just slow at the moment but I still don't understand why you are taking off your shirt."

"You cant see the gash on your head, but I can. So I am going to help you wash your hair here in the tub. I'll try not to get your dress wet but its bloody on the back, so I recommend taking it off anyway."

Between her drowsiness and Carmilla's exposed torso, Laura wasn't really thinking clearly and therefore complied far too easily. She pulled off her dress off her shoulders, bunching it around her waist while Carmilla started the bath water.

While Laura got settled on her knees in front of the tub, she caught sight of Carmilla's fingers flying over the keyboard of her phone.

"Are you telling your other date you wont be making it?" Laura teased to keep from outright staring at Carmilla's bra which was lacy and mostly see through.

"No." She rolled her eyes. "I'm talking to a friend of mine who has a lot of first aide knowledge about what happened. Just getting their opinion on your condition."

"I'm fine, just a mess."

"A hot mess" Carmilla replied quickly while testing the water.

"Okay, put your head under."

Laura did as she was told and used all the will power she had in her not to moan when Carmilla's fingers gently ran through her hair. She felt her body relax and the tightness in her chest all but disappear. She almost didn't even mind not being able to see the hot woman behind her. This was bliss, this was the first moment of peace she had felt since her world crumbled.

She was on the verge of falling asleep when Carmilla turned off the water and asked "Is it okay if my friend comes over to take a look at you? It would make me feel so much better."

Laura nodded and reached for a towel to wrap her hair in. Carmilla rubbed circles over Laura's back while she dialed a number with practiced ease on her phone.

"Hay Laf, you can come by when you get a sec." Looking down to Laura's head on her lap she added "She's falling asleep, so as soon as you can please."

Then Laura lost the battle and fell asleep. Carmilla comforting her as she drifted off.


	5. Chapter 5

Laura, as a reporter, had written about head injuries before. She had not however, ever experienced head trauma firsthand. In her extremely professional opinion, her pain level could best be described as "hurting like a bitch." At least she had Carmilla with her to act as a distraction. Though at the moment, even Carmilla's company wasn't enough to keep her heavy eyelids from falling. Vaguely she had heard Carmilla asking someone to hurry, then nothing.

The next thing Laura knew she was on her back, looking at the ceiling through cracked eyelids. Opening them further, she realized her body had magically made its way to the couch. The apartment was silent and Carmilla was nowhere to be found. It was odd for Carmilla to seem so concerned one minute and then to just disappear. Unless she had been unconscious for days. How long had it been? An hour? Three? An entire day?

Laura rolled off the couch in search of her phone or a calendar. Really anything that would indicate a date would suffice. Although the sudden movement proved to be exactly the wrong move to make. Her stomach churned and her brain felt as if it were going to bleed through her eye sockets.

The floor was going to be her new friend for the time being. There was no way she was going to even attempt to move on her own. It would have been really nice if Carmilla had stayed. Then again the two really hadn't known each other for all that long and this was the first time Carmilla had entered Laura's apartment. In all actuality it likely wasn't that strange that Carmilla left.

"Worst first date ever."

"What was that cupcake?"

Another sharp movement later and Laura felt like dying. Additionally, she still couldn't see Carmilla who had apparently switched from cutie to cupcake. At least cupcake was edible. Laura blamed her head injury for the wandering thoughts.

"Carm…is that you?"

"No its…where did you go?"

Carmilla got closer and Laura attempted to raise her arm.

"Down here. Potentially for all eternity."

"Laura…how the hell did you even get down there?" Carmilla spat out, probably more aggressive than she meant to.

"I tried to get up. But all I managed to do is get down. Can I get a little help here?"

"Laura, I need you not to move once I get you back up."

Carmilla pulled Laura up carefully and slowly, even with her shaky arms.

Red flashed across Laura's vision and she realized someone else was now here as well.

"Laura, this is Lafontaine. Laf, this is Laura."

Laura gave a feeble wave to the stranger and laid back down on the couch with Carmilla's assistance.

"Cupcake, this is my friend who is going to take a look at you if that's still okay with you. I promise they will be gentle."

Laura nodded and reached out out a hand. "Only if you hold my hand."

Again Laura blamed her throbbing brain.

Laura was a mess but still absolutely adorable. But even all the adorableness in the world wouldn't quell the worry in her. Lafontaine busied themselves with examining Laura. Shining a light into her eyes, having her count backwards and forwards and checking the wound itself.

When their fingertips parted her hair, Laura gripped Carmilla's fingers tight and hissed in pain.

Carmilla gripped Laura's hand in both of hers. "Are you okay?"

"Yea, it just stings a bit."

Carmilla tried and failed to contain the worry on her face. Laura was going to be the death of her.

Lafontaine put their things in their bag, looking away from Carmilla's drooling. Honestly, she couldn't have been more obvious with the worry lines between her eyebrows and general shakiness. That, paired with her nervously shifting eyes made it obvious she was head over heals. It was kind of gross and the sooner they got out of there, the better.

"Okay Ladies. I have good news and bad. Which would you like first?"

Carmilla shook more and blurted out, "bad first." without consulting Laura. Laura did her best not to laugh and nodded in agreement.

"Well Laura, you are stuck with leather pants here for the rest of the night. That's the bad news."

Carmilla sighed and threw mental daggers from her eyes at Lafontaine. They ignored that, as usual, and continued.

"The good news is, you don't need stitches and although I think you are concussed, I do believe it is a very mild concussion."

Carmilla sighed again and was either an asthmatic or extremely annoying.

"Now for the next three and a half to four hours, you shouldn't eat and only lightly drink clear fluids. After that you can eat foods gentle on your stomach until you are back to normal. You can sleep, but Carmilla you need to wake her up every two to three hours."

Carmilla gave a mock salute and didn't interrupt for once.

"And again Carmilla, I would like to remind you that this is a white hoodie I'm wearing, not a white coat. So if you get uncomfortable with her state or she gets worse, please consult and actual doctor."

Laura piped up in a squeaky voice that still somehow managed to be bubbly, even with a concussed brain.

"Where did you get your medical knowledge Laf?"

Straight to the shortened name. They could see how Carmilla came to like her so fast.

"Oh here and there, for this and that."

She didn't want to know when or for what. So they avoided truly answering the question and Carmilla's knowing gaze.

"Laura, you should start feeling better by morning, but you should still take it easy for a few days. It was nice meeting you, sorry it was under these circumstances."

"Thanks for coming by, and I apologize in advance for Carmilla bugging you until I get better."

She was spunky, they had to give her that.

"Not a problem."

As they walked towards the door, Laura and Carmilla gravitated towards each other. It didn't seem like a conscious decision. It was just easier to breathe when you were closer to your person. Lafontaine knew that. But they also knew what life would be like for them if they got together. Laura would be Carmilla's dirty little secret, and they wouldn't wish that pain on anyone. Least of all Laura. Sweet, dorky Laura who probably had no idea what she was in for.

What a shame they thought, and headed with the up-most stealth to Perry's place. Being the dirty secret was exhausting, and they were in for another long night.

So Laura was concussed and that was Carmilla's fault. She knew that and was weighed down with guilt. Her aim was to protect Laura and all she managed to do was harm her. She didn't even give Laura the chance to defend herself. Laura was no damsel in distress, she was a girl with grit who spoke her mind. She didn't need protection. Carmilla knew that now. It was the first of many wrongful assumptions she would make about Laura.

But mistakes aside, Carmilla owed it to her to give her all the care possible. The first step was to get Laura comfortable, and awkwardly laying on a lumpy couch in a dress haphazardly pulled back up, likely wasn't anywhere near true comfort.

"Why don't we get you into bed cutie?"

"Carmilla!" Laura made a dramatic O with her mouth, suppressing a grin. "You didn't even manage to get me to dinner and now you are trying to get me into bed?"

"I do believe I said get you into bed. Not us. Although I wouldn't be opposed to…"

Laura chucked a pillow in Carmilla's direction, cutting her off.

"Save the smooth talk for when I can enjoy it please. I will however, take your offer for help to the bed. Ill even make it worth your while."

Carmilla moved to help Laura scramble off the couch.

"Oh yeah? And how would you do that?"

"I might need help changing. Seeing as you are the only person here…well lets just say lucky you."

Two swift knocks, pause, a single knock.

Lafontaine had arrived. They were late, which wasn't completely unusual, but two hours was stretching it, even for them.

Perry opened the door quickly, ushering the in the door.

"Sweetie, where on earth have you been? I was starting to get worried."

Lafontaine shrugged off their hoodie and placed it on the coat rack as they had dozens of times before.

"Your'e always worried Perry. Don't fret, the secret homo police didn't catch me. Carmilla needed my help, it was urgent."

"Doesn't Carmilla worry about what her mother would say if she caught you two fraternizing?"

They rolled their eyes and added a scoff for good measure.

"No. I think Carmilla realizes her friends should be treated like friends, not like dirt the cleaning lady left behind."

Lafontaine never did see Perry's point of view. She had never set out to hurt them, yet it was all she seemed to do. Their relationship felt more like an affair than anything else, and she felt them slipping further away as time went on. She had to make them understand.

"Well that's fine for her. If she gets caught, she gets yelled at. I get caught, I lose my entire career."

"No your'e right Perry. You definitely have more to lose. It's not like she would lose her one and only mom or anything."

Lafontaine reached for their hoodie, clearly intending to cut their evening short. But Perry was determined not to lose them for another night. Not again. She spent too many nights alone, thinking about them. This was not going to be one of those nights.

"Okay, Laf, sweetie. Lets not fight…Iv'e missed you. I made your'e favorite dinner. Kept it warm in the crock pot and everything."

They paused and leaned back and forth on their feet. "Pot roast?"

"Yes. With lots of carrots."

"And red potatoes, not red right?"

"Of course. I wouldn't make it any other way for you."

Perry smiled, cherishing her victory, despite knowing their fight was only on pause.

They made their way to the couch and turned on Netflix. . Perry, of course, wouldn't let them serve themselves. Two bowls of pot roast later and the pair were curled up on the couch watching a ridiculously gory movie Laf picked out.

She knew they were just trying to bother her with tons of blood and a practically nonexistent plot. She chose instead to focus on their arms around her. She knew they were still mad, but they both needed each other on a basic level. They didn't have to be happy to hold her. They just needed a couch and their choice in awful movies. Although, they both knew that wouldn't be enough for long, they chose to ignore that fact. At least for the moment.


	6. Chapter 6

With their fight on pause, Perry and Laf were free to fill their night with other activities. Those activities, of course, leading the pair to the bedroom. The room was filled with giggles rather than light and they enjoyed every minute of it until they were rudely interrupted. Lafontaine checked the clock next to Perry's bed. Two thirty AM was lit up in bright red numbers.

The knocking of Perry's front door increased in both speed and volume.

"It's a bit late for visitors that aren't me, isn't it Perry?"

Perry sighed and sat up quickly to find her robe. "Well it obviously isn't you as you are in my bed. The only other person it could possibly be is the senator. I'm sorry but I need you to stay in here for a minute. "

Lafontaine laughed without a trace of humor and began to get dressed. "Don't forget your straight-girl mask before you go babe."

They shook their head but Perry knew she didn't have time for an argument. She instead left them to hide in the dark, unknowingly making a cataclysmic mistake.

Opening the door, Perry realized she was right. It was the senator. However, the senator was as Perry had never seen her. She was disheveled and looked lost.

"Senator, forgive me. I wasn't expecting you."

The senator walked in, without an invitation and began pacing. Perry's eyes flickered from her bedroom door to her unraveling boss.

"We have a problem Miss Perry."

"How can I help?"

The senator paused, looking critically at Perry.

"I was hoping you could get through to my daughter. I do wish she was more like you. You are a career driven woman. None of this homosexual nonsense to distract you."

Perry cleared her throat, not wanting to linger on her personal life and continued in a pitch even higher than normal.

"What has Carmilla done now?"

The senator sat on the couch, crossing her legs and eyeing the room around her with squinted eyes.

"She punched a man in the face in front of a dozen people. Several of which caught it on camera. All for some girl. No one I recognize." She shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"My daughter is out there punching strangers for a girl who is a nobody. I warned her to get her act together. This is the worst possible time for her insubordination."

"We can smooth over her actions as always, but I don't see why right now is worse than any other time."

The senator stood, again beginning to pace.

"I was going to wait until next week to tell you, but I will be running for governor in the upcoming election."

Running for governor was a whole different ballgame than being a senator. It was a huge step that would put everyone  
associated with the senator under scrutiny, including Perry. Anyone investigating Perry wouldn't have to look far to find Lafontaine. Honestly the discovery of her relationship would ruin everything for both Perry and the senator. The secret had to be held tighter than ever.

"That's fantastic Madam Senator. I'm happy to help in any way I can. That includes wrangling Carmilla. Did you need me to start on that tonight?"

"Considering that child doesn't wake until three PM every day, I think that would be best."

"Absolutely. I'll just go throw on some clothes and head over there. I'll deal with the press as I go and report to you in the morning."

The senator moved to leave, but paused mid exit "Thank you for not being a disappointment thus far. I can't say the same for many people, Carmilla included."

With that, the Senator left, leaving behind an atmosphere of general unease. Lafontaine emerged a moment later, fully dressed and scowling.

"Looks like you have a busy night. I'll just go."

"Sweetie...what was so urgent with Carmilla earlier?"

Lafontaine roughly pulled on their hoodie, putting their head and arms through the appropriate holes.

"No. I won't help you with this Perry. The only thing you get to know is that Carmilla isn't home. So don't bother looking for her there."

"Laf, I'm sorry our night is ruined. I really am. But if you want to blame anyone, blame Carmilla."

"The only person I am blaming for anything is you. Once again I'm pushed to the side and I'm beyond done with it. You can't have me and this job Perry. You just can't."

Perry wanted to be shocked, but really she saw this coming from a mile away. They were unhappy, and that was her fault.

"What happened to, I won't make you choose. I know where we stand no matter what?"

"That was before I started to think...to think that maybe...oh never mind Perry."

"No go ahead. Tell me. That was before you started to think what?"

Lafontaine stood with one hand on the doorknob, the other pulling their short, messy hair.

"I said that when I thought you would have chosen me if you had to. Now I'm not so sure you would anymore."

Lafontaine slammed the door shut and thundered down the stairs. They were gone, maybe for good.  
_

Laura was sleeping deeply under her yellow and white comforter. She snored lightly, giving Carmilla peace of mind that Laura was okay. The time on Carmilla's phone continued to tick down, reading twenty-seven minutes the last time it was checked. She rolled her eyes, attempting to keep them moist, and shifted gently on her side of the bed. It was almost time to wake Laura; she couldn't risk falling asleep now.

After this, she would only have to wake Laura once more, but the weight of the night pushed her eyelids down with constant determination. They began to flutter, taking longer each time to re-open. She lost the battle and let her head fall back against Laura's headboard. Her saving grace was her phone that lit up and rang at top volume. Lafontaine's gummy smile peered at her while Carmilla tried desperately to silence her phone.

"Laf, is everything okay?" Carmilla whispered urgently while climbing out of the bed.

"Sorry to call so late. I just thought you might want to know you're mom knows about your little street brawl and Laura. Perry is on damage control."

"Well that was fast. What did you tell Perry about it?"

Laf sighed loudly "Nothing besides you aren't home so she needn't bother trying there."

"Trouble in paradise gingersnap?"

"How's Laura?" They asked, refusing to take Carmilla's bate.

"She's fine. Sleeping like a log at the moment."

"That's good" They paused, clicking their tongue as they always did when contemplating. "So what's with this Laura girl anyway?"

"Tell you what, you don't ask about Laura and I won't ask about your train wreck of a relationship okay?"

More tongue clicking. "Deal. Good luck with your mother. Goodnight."

"Good night and good luck with your wife."

Lafontaine hung up before Carmilla had the chance to. But she knew they weren't upset. At least not upset with her. Their friendship was built on insults and general sarcasm. What better to have as a foundation really?

Laura's snoring stopped as she sat up and rubbed her sleep filled eyes.

"Carm…"

"Right here cupcake." Carmilla rushed back to the bed and pulled Laura into her arms.

"I thought you left again."

"Of course not. Why do you keep assuming I'm going to leave you?"

Laura shook her head and pulled herself from Carmilla's grip.

"No reason. Hey can I eat yet?"

"I don't think you are really supposed to yet, but I don't think something small could do much damage."

"Good" Laura huffed, climbing out of bed.

"Hey, hey. Wait. I'd be happy to get something for you."

Laura didn't even pause on her walk towards the kitchen. "It's fine. I can do it myself."

It was unsettling to see Laura switch to being so cold. She riffled through her fridge, sighing frequently and shaking her head. She ended up choosing cookies and milk, sitting on the couch to eat them.

"Are you feeling okay cutie?"

"It's Laura. Not cutie. Not cupcake. Just Laura."

"Okay. Sorry….Laura." Carmilla raised her hands and stepped towards the door. "Did you want me to leave you be?"

Laura picked up the cookies from the seat next to her. "No. I'm sorry. Come sit, please."

Carmilla gladly accepted and sat at a respectable distance. This shift in Laura's mood threw her off. From what she had seen previously, Laura was all sunshine and adorkable nerves. This Laura was unnerving. Carmilla just wanted to fix it, but didn't know what the problem was to fix it.

Laura offered her a cookie and a small smile. There was more to Laura Hollis than met the eye. Carmilla made it her number one goal to figure her out. The cost to obtain that information didn't matter.

A car horn woke Laura with a start. She was still on the couch, but had somehow managed to lie between Carmilla's legs, with her head on Carm's chest. That was one way to wake up to a great day.

Speaking of, Laura had no idea how long she had been sleeping. The sun was up and people lined the sidewalks. More people than usual, but that investigation would have to wait. Laura was distracted by Carmilla's gentle face. When sleeping she looked like an angel. Even with her jaw hanging open and ruffled clothes, she was the most beautiful thing Laura had ever seen. She didn't want to ever look at anyone or anything else. Though try as she might, flashing from the T.V showing the morning news distracted her.

Sometime during the night Carmilla must have turned on the T.V. What was surprising, was to not only see Carmilla's face beneath her, but also on the T.V in front of her.

The subtitles Carmilla must have also turned on read as "Known rebel Carmilla Karnstein, daughter of senator Debbie Karnstein was spotted last night in what can only be described as a back alley brawl. Witnesses are stating that the violence was to allegedly defend the woman who accompanied her against harassment. No word yet on who that woman was or what her relationship is to the Senator's daughter. A source in the police station has stated that as of now, no criminal charges are pending. More on this story later."

The story switched to something about a panda at the local zoo giving birth, but Laura was a million miles away. The girl she was laying on top of was the senator's daughter. Not just any senator, arguably one of the most conservative senators in the country. This wasn't good.

Carmilla shifted as Laura sat up quickly to turn off the T.V.

"Morning cupcake…sorry, morning Laura." Carmilla said through a cracked voice.

"No" Laura thought "This wasn't good at all."


	7. Chapter 7

Carmilla watched as Laura flitted around her apartment. She, gently, pulled her hair into a ponytail before sliding on flip-flops and a hoodie. It didn't matter if she was in a lacy dress or shorts and a hoodie. She was damn gorgeous either way. But now wasn't the time to gawk. Laura noticed a growing crowd outside just after they woke up. It didn't take long before she began rushing to get ready and insisted that they go investigate. Laura being fired didn't make her any less of a journalist; it just meant she wasn't being paid to be nosey.

Carmilla rolled up the sleeves of the thin red sweater Laura lent her. It smelled like the mint lotion she saw in Laura's bathroom. But mostly, it just smelled like Laura. It was distracting to be surrounded by Laura's aroma, even with Laura across the room, but she had to focus. She knew damn well what was happening on the street below, and it was nothing she could be seen at. Figuring out how to tell Laura that without arousing suspicion would be the tricky part. She was going to hold onto her secret, and by extension, Laura for as long as possible. It was bordering on delusion, but Carmilla wanted Laura. All of Laura, her dorky obsessions and unrelenting nosiness and all. In reality they were barely more than strangers. Carmilla knew that, but she also knew Laura was kind, gorgeous, smart and liked her back, even if was just a fraction of the amount.

"Hey, Laura." Carmilla reached for Laura as she grabbed her keys. "I think you should take it easy today. You know, have a rest day."

"No way" Laura shook her head. "If something is going on, literally right outside my door, I cant ignore that. I promise I won't participate in any rioting Carm. I just want to observe. It's what I was meant to do."

Laura leaned on the tips of her toes and kissed Carmilla's cheek. "You're an artist, you can understand having a calling right?"

"Of course I can." Carmilla felt her blood rush to her face. Specifically she felt her left cheek burn from Laura's lips. "You just scared me yesterday is all. I want you safe and healthy."

"Well you're with me right? How can I not be safe with my body guard around?"

Laura probably meant physically with her instead of any other form with could mean. But it's fun to fantasize.

This wasn't working. If Carmilla couldn't convince Laura to stay home, then she had to explain why she couldn't go with her. She couldn't be her body guard, or anything else for that matter.

"I can't go Laura. I'm sorry I have other obligations today. I didn't really sleep and I have some…family stuff to attend to."

"Oh" Laura avoiding looking anywhere near Carmilla and stepped towards the door. "Then I guess we both should be going."

"Laura…"

Laura rolled her eyes and put sunglasses on, "Let's go."

"I didn't mean to upset you. I just…"

"Don't Carmilla. You are clearly too busy for me today. So just go."

Carmilla knew she lost this battle. And perhaps the war. Her mother wasn't even here and she still managed to ruin everything.  
She went down the stairs ahead of Laura and opened the lobby door. Laura walked through it without a thank you or a look back.

Yeah, Carmilla fucked up.

* * *

Carmilla walked away, leaving Laura to walk in the opposite direction. People in varying states of dress filtered past her talking animatedly. Laura pulled out her pen and notebook, stopping a man in nothing but rainbow shorts and black flip-flops.

"Hi, thanks for talking to me. I was wondering if you could tell me why you are out here today?"

His eyes turned dark as his head dipped.

"Too many people in our community are dying. There are no consequences. The cops look the other way while we are being slaughtered."

Now Laura knew the crowd was less a gathering and more of a protest.

"Have you ever thought about leaving the city?"

He shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. Laura took note of the faint pink scars under his pec muscles.

"No, this is our city. They don't get to chase us out of our own city. No matter the means, our end result will be us staying in our city. Our city that will be safe for us to live in. We won't accept anything less."

Laura pushed away her nerves and asked the question she knew had to be asked.

"Do you think the trans community specifically is more at risk than the rest of the LGBTQA community?"

"We are all at risk, but at this point, in the trans community we have stopped hoping nothing will happen to us. Instead we hope that when something happens to us, it will be something we can recover from. We are terrified every day, and it's exhausting."

Stay professional Laura. Don't get sucked in Laura. You will not riot, you will only observe. Laura kicked herself internally until the only thing that came out of her mouth was, "Thank you for your time and thoughts."

The man walked away to join his friends, leaving Laura to stew. She needed to figure out how to help. While looking for someone else to interview/get more details out of, Laura spotted Lafontaine. They were darting between people who were demanding their attention.

"Laf, hey."

They turned towards her, taking a moment in their distracted state to register who she was.

"Hey Laura. How are you feeling today?"

"Much better thanks to you and your expert care."

Laura nodded appreciatively as Laf gave a faint smile.

Lafontaine craned their neck looking in all directions before asking "Where's Carmilla?"

"Something about other obligations. I don't really know. It's just me." Laura redirected quicker than she meant to. "Why exactly are you here?"

"The technical reason? It is my job to assess any movements happening as head assistant to Senator Burly. The true reason?" They asked, it seemed, mostly to themselves. "Janet was a good friend of mine. She was murdered for just being who she was. It's up to all of us left behind to make sure her death doesn't go unnoticed. She was the kindest person I've ever known. She deserves justice. We all do. So we're here, to let the city know enough is enough."

A crowd Laura never noticed gathering, began nodding and clapping. She looked around and in every set of misty eyes she saw admiration, hope, and rage. It was clear Laf was their unofficial leader.

The boiling pot of their collective emotions was barely being contained. Lafontaine was the wooden spoon holding back the bubbling surface. Against all reason they didn't rise above the set limit. Though with stoking flames underneath, an overflow and explosion was inevitable. They just needed time.

Laura wondered what would override the calm when, as if on cue, a scream echoed in the distance. The blood curdling screech bounced off buildings and landed on unsuspecting ears with a deafening blow.

The crowd surged forward, opening only to let allow Lafontaine to rush through, beckoning Laura to follow quickly.

Reaching the epicenter of chaos, Laura saw a tight circle of people with linked arms surrounding a woman and man lying on the pavement.

"What happened Elsie?" Lafontaine shouted to a blond woman that rushed towards the approaching spectators.

"The guy in the green muscle tank was beating up that woman with some other guys. We scared the rest of them off but he kept kicking her. His boots were doing a lot of damage."

Laura eyes the man's boots that were laced with red laces.

Elsie escorted Laura and Lafontaine to the inside of the circle where a tall trans woman with a dark brown wig and a torn ruby red dress was curled into a fetal position. The man in the green muscle tank was unconscious, a thin line of blood dripping down his pale forehead.

"We told him to stop," Elsie continued "But he didn't, so a bunch of people teamed up to knock him out. I need you to take a look at her though. She's in pretty bad shape."

Lafontaine nodded swinging their backpack off.

"Laura, grab my flashlight and stethoscope out of my bag. Now please."

She did as she was told, suppressing her questions for the moment.

Laf did a once over quickly. They nodded and clicked their tongue as they listened to breath sounds on both sides of the woman's chest.

Blood continued to flow from the woman's side as she moaned and struggled under Lafontaine's probing fingertips.

"Laura" They beckoned her over. "I need you to keep pressure there while I do a neuro exam. I'm sorry, but you will likely get a bit messy."

Laura overlapped her hands without hesitation and put pressure over the wound.

"Good, just like that."

They quickly did a similar exam that Laura received just the night before and sighed loudly.

"Okay, I think you have a couple fractured ribs. At least one of them is pushing against your lung. It may be punctured. I think you will be just fine but you do need to get to the hospital right away. I'll have some people take you right now if that is okay with you."

"Why can't we call an ambulance?" Laura interrupted without thinking.

"Because. They won't come for us during a protest. They never do."

Laura was stunned and didn't have the stomach to ask another question. Instead she agreed to help the woman, Bobbi as she would later find out, get to the hospital. After all, it was her hands that were holding in what remained of the woman's blood.

They lifted her carefully but quickly into the bed of a nearby truck. Bobbi began to gasp for air, gurgling until her head was elevated. Even the shortest of rides would have been too long in that moment.

* * *

Perry was dead tired, but far from done with work for the day. At around her twentieth call she contemplated making a pre recorded message for each caller. A message that assured them Carmilla wouldn't continue her escapades. Perry sent her hope for a break out into the universe when rapid and sudden banging on her from door startled her. She only had to wonder who it was for a moment when Carmilla called out "Open up closet ginger." Perry, in hindsight, should have been more specific in what type of break she wanted.

She wrenched open the door with a frown and a huff.

"Must you be so loud at all times Carmilla?"

Carmilla rolled her eyes and barged in without an invitation.

"Must you meddle in things that aren't your business?"

"As the problematic daughter of my boss, everything you do is my business." Perry fired back.

Carmilla was growing more aggravated by the second, pacing and sighing every two seconds.

"I did what I had to Perry. I won't apologize for that."

"Oh you had to hit him? There was no other possible solution?"

"Perry" Carmilla sighed "I thought he was hurting her. I couldn't just stand there trying to think of a better way to handle the situation. Are you really telling me if Laf was in danger you wouldn't act?"

"No." She shook her head. "I would think of a more diplomatic resolution. One that wouldn't ruin anyone's career."

That was it. Carmilla's tolerance for Perry evaporated in a half second.

"That is reason number one of a thousand why you don't deserve them."

Perry was shocked into silence. Her skin turned the same shade of red as her curly hair, while her mouth hung open wordlessly. Though apparently Perry didn't need to respond. Someone else stood in the door that hadn't been closed in the heat of the moment.

"Who doesn't she deserve, Carmilla?"

Carmilla whipped around to meet the unwelcome intruders eyes.

"Oh, um. Hello mother."

Well this was going to require a lot of vague explaining.


	8. Chapter 8

Carmilla was stuck between two piercing gazes and was unsure which she was more terrified of. Perry's eyes went wide while her skin turned the same shade of violent red as her hair. Her mother's eyes narrowed to slits while her lips pursed tightly shut.

Carmilla was backed against a wall and didn't see a lot of pleasing options.

"Mother, what brings you here?"

"You didn't answer my question Carmilla."

Carmilla resisted the urge to flinch and gave her best attempt at seeming like her usual unaffected self.

"That's because it is unimportant mother. I tried to convert Perry to a band that I like, she was unimpressed. That's blasphemy in my book. I was just in the middle of telling Perry why she didn't deserve their greatness anyway."

She shrugged and shook her head at Perry who was visibly deflating and returning to her usual pale complexion.

The senator laced her fingers tightly behind her back and glued on her go-to stoic façade.

"Well you would think you would have better things to discuss given recent events."

Once again her mother was trying to run her life, and Carmilla felt her anger begin to boil. She had a lifetime of rage built up and knew it was only a matter of time before she let every bit of it out. Generally she avoided both her mother and Perry for that very reason, but lines were crossed.

Perry had every right to ruin and closet her own life. She did not however, have the right to closet Laf, Carmilla and Laura. It was obvious Perry thought she was just doing her job, but at a certain point, morality must override chosen responsibility. Her mother however, had no morality, no inner voice made of all that's good and just. She was made entirely of determination and undeniable self preservation.

Those issues would have to be handled later. At that moment she needed her mother and minions off her back long enough to mop up the mess with Laura.

"Yeah, you're probably right mother. I just was telling Perry I'm going to do my best to stay out of trouble. I know it harms your…goals."

The senator cocked her head to the side quickly and cracked her knuckles that were still locked behind her rigid back. It meant wrath was coming. Carmilla was versed enough in her mother's body language to know she needed to get out of there.

"Did you just say yeah in a sentence directed towards me?"

Her voice was barely above a whisper but it felt deafening to Carmilla.

"That's my mistake mother. I meant to say yes. My apologies."

Carmilla didn't recall making the decision to bow her head, yet there she stood. Head bowed and toes pointing inwards. She was five years old again, standing next to a broken vase and holding an endless amount of fear. She was eight and standing outside her front door with no keys and shaking hands, trying to find the extra key before her mother came home to find her keyless.  
She felt small, vulnerable and anxious of the incoming storm that was her mother.

Carmilla stepped back as her mother approached. Perry looked between the two, face filled with confliction.

Her apology, as she already knew before saying it, was not enough to placate her mother's anger.

"How dare you speak to me in such a….casual tone? You, are, my daughter." She paused between words, assuring everyone in the room that she was making a point.

"You will conduct yourself in a manner in which I raised you. Despite your denial, there is structure in this world. Structure that you must follow and support. You are not the spawn of some poor, used whore with thirteen children. You come from a righteous bloodline and you will remember and honor that fact."

She stepped backwards and cracked her neck, leaving Carmilla trembling and silent.

"Now, you will apologize to Ms Perry for bringing conflict into her…home." The senator eyed Perry's apartment with thinly disguised disgust.

"Additionally you will get rid of whoever that peasant of a woman that caused you to go off the deep end. Understand?"

"Yes" Carmilla steadied her voice and raised he eyes to meet her mother's. "Of course mother."

"Good. Now run along while the adults attend to business."

Carmilla's phone vibrated in her pocket but she knew better than to look at it with her mother around.

"A good day to you both then."

Carmilla nodded her head slightly at them both before waling quickly through the door she just burst through minutes before.  
She refused to check her phone until she was safely out of the building two missed calls, one from Laf, the other from a number she didn't recognize, and two texts also from Laf.

Opening the first message, she was taken aback by the all caps text.

Laf 1:02 PM- YOU DIDN'T TELL LAURA WHO YOU ARE? SHE IS A REPORTER NUMBSKULL. SHE WILL FIND OUT. YOU HAVE TO TELL HER FIRST.

Carmilla shook her head at Lafontaine's aggressive warning. They were right of course, but she was hoping to live in ignorant bliss for a while first. She opened the second message, hoping for something less aggressive.

Laf 1:45 PM- You should prob check on Laura. She had a rough day. I gave her your number. IDK if she will call though. She seemed pretty pissed you weren't at the demonstration today.

Carmilla rolled her eyes at their gentle pushing. They didn't have to say much to unload a heavy opinion. She appreciated that aspect of Laf. She knew where they stood without being berated about it endlessly.

She sent out a quick _thanks,_ to Laf but couldn't manage much more with her hands still shaking. Perry would tell them about her run in with her mother, no need for her to as well.

Taking in a deep breath, Carmilla opted to walk to Laura's rather than taking a cab. She could only hope by then her hands would still and apathy would cover the fear in her eyes. She couldn't go into a terrifying conversation already terrified.

* * *

Laura's body ached and brain felt heavy and strained. It had been a long day and looking up at the afternoon sun, she realized it was far from over.

She had blood splattered over her hoodie and splotched on her thighs. Though her hands had been washed and rewashed, they still felt as if they were dripping in blood.

Lafontaine gave her their number as well as Carmilla's as she left with Bobbi. She texted Laf with an update on Bobbi's condition, and against all her inner warnings, she dialed Carmilla's number as she left the hospital. It went to voicemail and Carmilla's sultry voice dripped though her phone's speaker.

 _"Hi…its me, Carmilla. Except its me on voicemail. If you're listening to this it probably means I don't want to talk to you. Call me back later, or don't. Maybe I'll call you, if I like you."_

God, Laura thought, Carmilla could be such an asshole.

She was surprised at her own bitterness, but didn't have enough room in her mind to question it much.

She made her way home with dragging feet, ignoring the many sets of staring eyes. She was covered in blood and walking slowly. Maybe they thought she was a zombie.

Laura was contemplating whether she would notice if she was a zombie or not when she arrived at her building and saw Carmilla leaning against the wall waiting for her. One of her feet was propping her up on the wall behind her while her arms stayed tightly crossed over her chest. She looked amazing as always and Laura's stomach flipped when she saw Carmilla was still in the tight red sweater she lent her. Laura knew she would never wear that sweater again. There was no way it would ever look that good on her.

"Hey cutie. You look…like you had a rough day and could use a shower."

Laura rolled her eyes, causing the throbbing in her head to flare up.

"You sure know how to woo a girl don't you?"

"I'll woo later. I just want to make sure you are ok. Is that your blood?"

"No" Laura waved for Carmilla to follow her inside. "It's a long story I'll tell you if you give me a minute to shower."

"I can be patient. You can have several minutes if you need them. Probably like ten would be my limit. Anything more is just a crazy amount to need."

Carmilla may be an ass sometimes, but she had her moments where her sarcasm was like a breeze on an unbearably hot day. Her smile, though often fleeting, was the best kind of medicine. Laura needed medicine, she was hurt and stunned and just needed some calm and quiet. She needed Carmilla. This stranger that just appeared in her life seemed to be a fixture that had always meant to be there. It was a strange thought, but a settling feeling.

Laura let Carmilla in her apartment as if she had done it a thousand times before and fell into a comfortable silence while she gathered her things for a shower. She looked to Carmilla who sat content on her couch and thought maybe her secret wasn't such a big deal. We all had secrets; Carmilla's evil mother wasn't something she could help. It was hard to be mad at her for a family she didn't choose to be in. Somehow, she could move past this.

* * *

Carmilla stood awkwardly in the center of Laura's living room, glancing at the seating options surrounding her, but choosing not to sit. Her nerves claimed more of her by the second. Laura trusted her to be alone in her place while she showered. There didn't seem to be any fear of wrongdoing, and yet, Carmilla felt as if she had done nothing _but_ wrong. Laura didn't have a clue who Carmilla actually was. Every word out of her mouth was laced with hypocrisy and secrecy.

She was a fool to believe she had any chance with Laura. While every part of her life was blanketed in secrecy, it was in Laura's very nature to be truthful and uncover the honesty in others.

People have asked for ages, what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. Of course it is a trick question. Both cannot exist at the same time. This is true just as secrecy and honesty cannot occupy the same space. So in that train of thought, Carmilla had to wonder, which of the two of them got to exist?

Did Laura get to go on in her search of justice and absolute truth? Or did Carmilla get to continue her task of staying within the lines of her mother's expansive shadow. There were only two outcomes and Carmilla wasn't sure which she would prefer. Either the shadows would devour Laura, or the light would pierce the monstrous shadow. Thus letting the darkness evaporate, leaving all of Carmilla's choices be visible in the light of day.

Carmilla paced, lost in her own head. It seemed to be a never ending cavern until Laura's voice pulled her to the surface of her own consciousness.

"Try not to give yourself an aneurism there Carm."

"Sorry," Carmilla tried her best to pull the corners of her lips to a smile. "I was just wondering if my degree in philosophy has warped my way of thinking for all eternity."

"And my living room brought up these thoughts? What, were you thinking about what it would mean if you chose the chair over the couch to sit on?" Laura joked while heading to her room, hopefully to replace her towel with clothes. Carmilla was having a hard enough time concentrating without adding in Laura being practically naked to the mix.

"That would be more psychology than philosophy cupcake." Carmilla kept the conversation going in a weak attempt at a distraction.

"Philosophy is more wondering if humans were always meant to sit on chairs or if we developed the expectation of chairs anthropologically speaking."

"Well now you've gone over my head, but that's ok. I don't think that's what you were actually pondering anyway. "  
Laura returned to the living room in black yoga pants and a loose grey tank top. It was better than a towel, but really Laura in anything was a physical distraction.

She sat on the middle cushion on the couch, beckoning Carmilla to join her. With a great amount of hesitation and forethought, Carmilla obliged. She had to tell her the full truth. Laura was too good of a person to be swindled.

She allowed herself a moment to bask in the presence that was purely Laura. Water droplets dripped from her hair that was pulled into a messy bun, down her neck and disappeared into the front of her tank top. Her skin was red from the hot water of the shower, but smelled like her mint lotion. Mostly, Carmilla noticed Laura's eyes. They looked at her without any guards or barriers. They were screaming out some sort of message, but the translation was lost in Carmilla's nerves.

"Laura look….I think I have to tell you about-"

Laura cut Carmilla's words short by running her fingertips over the frazzled woman's lips.

"You don't have to tell me anything. I know there is something, but we all have something. You are entitled to yours. I just need you to be here with me. The rest can wait for when you know, rather than think you need to tell me. Can you do that?"  
Carmilla kissed the tips of Laura's fingers and answered in a broken whisper, "Yeah, I can do that."

Laura pulled her face away from Carmilla's that had somehow come within millimeters of her own, and cleared her throat.

"Good. Now I don't know about you but I could use a cheesy movie and some hot chocolate, can we talk about my blood stained day tomorrow?"

"As long as you are okay, then I'm okay with that plan."

Laura let out a tiny squeal and hopped her way into the kitchen to make the hot chocolate.  
It was not at all how Carmilla envisioned her night to go, but she had to admit, it was a pleasant alternative.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Carmilla watched as Laura tensed up once again after some sketchy kid on the TV popped up out of nowhere. Cheesy scifi movies turned into cheesy scifi TV once Laura discovered Carmilla had never seen Doctor Who. Laura quickly pulled up the show and snuggled into Carmilla's side for what she promised would be a _super duper creepy_ episode.

All Carmilla managed to digest of the show was that a clearly shady kid was running around in a gas mask, and the Doctor's main personality trait was sarcasm. Mostly she focused on Laura's hand that rested on her chest, and legs that were tangled in her own. It felt simple, and Carmilla could use some simple.

The hot chocolate began to run out and Laura's eyelids started to droop, staying closed longer with each blink. While Carmilla was enjoying simple, she knew she shouldn't stay the night. Laura was cute and sweet and had a rough day. Really she just wanted to comfort Laura. Meanwhile Carmilla's instincts were trying desperately to convince her that kissing Laura would comfort them both. But kissing erased simple, and simple was important.

"Hey cupcake-"

Laura snapped her head up and tried her best to appear alert.

"Yeah, hey. Isn't this episode just great?"

"So great it's biggest fan is falling asleep?"

"Who me?" Laura gave a sleepy, lopsided grin. "I was just testing you to make sure you were into it. You failed by the way."

"Yeah," Carmilla sighed. "I do that often"

Carmilla detached Laura's limbs from her own and stood to stretch. She just barely caught Laura eyeballing the momentarily revealed sliver of skin between her sweater and pants.

"Are you leaving?" Laura asked reaching for Carmilla's hand.

"Yes, I need a shower cutie. Looking this good requires maintenance and I don't want to steal anymore of your clothes. Although, I do like this sweater."

"You can keep it. Looks better on you anyhow."

Carmilla reached the front door before deciding to push Laura's buttons. It was becoming her favorite hobby to see how many times she could get Laura to bunch up her nose in annoyance.

"Trying to say you want me in your clothes? You could have just said so you know."

"Hush" Laura grinned and stepped closer to Carmilla. "Before I make you stay and I take my clothes back."

"Don't threaten me with a good time."

Laura rolled her eyes but still leaned up on her toes and placed a lingering kiss on Carmilla's cheek.

"I'll see you tomorrow Carm."

"And what makes you think you'll be seeing me tomorrow?"

"Because I said so. Obviously. What other reason would there be?"

It was Carmilla's turn to roll her eyes as she was being pushed into the hall.

"Call me when you want me cupcake." Carmilla shouted over her shoulder just before reaching the stairs.

She took her time going down the stairs, lost in thoughts of Laura, and she just reached the lobby door when her phone vibrated in the back pocket of her jeans.

Laura 10:32 PM- I always want you. But I'll still call you tomorrow when I'm ready to see you.

Laura followed the message with another consisting entirely of a ridiculous emoji that had bulging eyes and a protruding tongue. This woman was going to be the death of her. Perhaps literally if her mother found out she was doing the exact opposite of what she was asked to do.

That was going to be a problem for another day. Carmilla instead focused on Laura's flirting and her cheek that felt singed by Laura's lips.

She was so enamored with Laura that she was rendered completely unaware of her surroundings, including the trailing footsteps behind her. Her loft was entirely too far away.

Lafontaine sighed as they pulled on their pajamas. It had been a long day and they just wanted sleep. Now that their shower was out of the way, the only thing between them and sleep was the few steps to their bed.

But of course, just as everything in their life, that didn't go as planned.

With one knee on their bed, Laf heard a sharp knock at the door. There wasn't any question on who it was. Of course it was Perry. Even her knock was to the point and demanding.

Laf wondered if they could get away with pretending not to be home, or saying they had headphones on and couldn't hear a thing. But honesty was their main goal in life, and besides, Perry knew where the spare key was.

They took their time walking to the door, dragging their heavy feet as they went. Perry continued her rapid knocking until Laf opened it with an aggravated huff.

"What Perry?"

"Well hello to you too dear. Can I come in?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"There is always a choice. Even if the choice would be unwise to choose."

Perry waited for any sign of protest. Finding none, she entered, taking care not to brush against Lafontaine.

"We need to talk." Perry mumbled as she looked at the messy state of Laf's house.

"We really don't. I just want to sleep. That's the only thing I want on the planet earth right now."

"Even over me?" Perry stepped back, mouth agape.

Lafontaine hesitated. While what they wanted to say was true, it was going to hurt, and they were used to healing, not hurting.

"Yes. Right now all I want is sleep. I've had a rough day, and I can't do this right now."

"What happened today sweetie? I've had a rough day too, but I want to hear about yours first."

"Oh I'm sure yours was just terrible Perry. What? Did Senator Satan yell at you for getting her coffee order wrong?"

Lafontaine knew they were screaming, and knew they were hurting Perry more with each word. But they had enough. They couldn't do this any longer.

"That's not fair. I work really hard on very important things."

"Yeah you work really hard building up everything I fight to tear down. You actively work against not only me, but every member of our community every day."

Perry threw her hands into the air. "What would you like me to do? You want me to just walk into her office in the morning and quit?"

"Yeah." Laf nodded vigorously. "That wouldn't be such a bad idea."

"So you want me to just throw away my entire career?"

"No…I want you to stop throwing me away. I fight everyday with people who are literally giving their lives to make sure this world is a safe and fair place. And you….you just hide behind enemy lines like a coward."

"This isn't a war Lafontaine. And what I hide of my personal business is none of the Senator's concern. You can't just force people to come out, simply because it makes life easier for you."

Lafontaine felt their hair stand on end as they crossed their arms defiantly.

"This is a war, and you aren't just hiding yourself, you're hiding me. I don't think I deserve to be hidden."

Lafontaine began pacing, lowering their voice to a whisper and discretely wiping away their tears.

"I mean, do you really think this is what I wanted for my life? Do you think I like coming out to every fucking person I talk to?"

Perry shook her head but knew Lafontaine wasn't done. This storm had been building for a long time, and it wouldn't be short lived.

"Do you really think I like having to explain myself to people? I can't even fully explain myself to me. What's the best way to explain to people that I'm a person with woman parts that likes other people with woman parts. Then they ask me what I mean when I say person with woman parts and I somehow have to explain that I don't identify with either end of the gender binary. They look at me like I'm a freak."

Lafontaine sucked in a shaky breath.

"And maybe I am a freak. But I, as a freak, have just as much of the right to exist in peace as any other human being on the planet. But it doesn't matter how well I explain myself or how many historical references I can find. At the end of the day I'm still worthless, and that's because of people like you."

"Do you mean the people I work for?"

"No Perry. You help them make life harder for me each and every day. You sit beside them as they call our people deviants and pass new laws that threaten our safety. You stand there and never say a word. You _are_ them, and I can't stand the sight of you anymore."

Perry opened her mouth once, twice, a hundred times but still couldn't find the words. Lafontaine really didn't want to hear them anyway.

"Just go. I imagine you know where the door is by now."

Perry left without a word but didn't close the door behind her. Laf knew Perry wanted to be chased after, but there would be no chase. The pain wasn't worth it.


End file.
